Making friends was all so easy when I was a kid. It seems like kids don’t have to do anything more than the bare minimum of being nice and playing together on the playground, and suddenly they have all these besties! Lucky ducks.
In high school and college I became friends with my classmates–on top of all the time we spent together in class, we worked on enough projects together that we really got to know each other.
As an out-of-college adult, though, it isn’t so easy. I can’t meet people through school anymore, and I clearly can’t just invite someone to swing on the swings with me. After a year and a half of pandemic living, everyone is desperate to make friends and no one remembers how. Don’t fret, though! The Lars team put our heads together and came up with our best friend-making tips. Read on to learn more!
These days everyone’s wondering how to make friends as an adult. The pandemic has us all feeling desperate for genuine human connection, and more confused than ever about where to find it. Or maybe you’re like me, and over the last year you’ve watched Anne of Green Gables, Grace and Frankie, Booksmart, and other shows and movies about best friends so you’re craving a kindred spirit.
It’s important to remember that you’re not the only one who wants friends, so odds are that people want to be friends with you, too! Follow these ten tips and learn how to make friends as an adult like a pro!
Join a Craft Community
Look, I know you’re not surprised that this is the top of the Lars list, but hear me out. If you’re a crafter, there are probably like-minded people in crafting communities that you could become great friends with! And crafting together is such a great friendship building activity because you have lots of time to talk and inherently lots of crafty things to talk about. Swap favorite patterns or tips, talk about your go-to materials, and learn from seasoned crafters around you.
This is also a great way to make friends of all ages, which is an important way to build a rich social life and healthy community.
Look for crafting communities online, at local craft stores, or maybe ask your local library if they know of any.
Book Club
Book clubs are another great way to make friends as an adult because in a book club you get to hear people’s ideas. Lots of book clubs have themes, so if you really love a certain genre or topic, which means that everyone there has something in common. At a book club you’ll probably find a group of people you love talking to and you’ll never run out of conversations to have.
If you want to start a book club, find one or two other people who are as dedicated to it as you are and join forces to run it and choose books. You can also find book clubs online (zoom book club, anyone?) or by connecting to your local library. We even ran a Lars Book Club for a while, so you can find some recommendations in our archive or in this reading list.
Community Art Classes
Lots of cities and neighborhoods have community centers with lots of resources, including art classes! I’ve found that I meet a really diverse, interesting demographic when I join community-run classes.
If your town has a community center or rec center, that would be a great place to look for a community art class. There are usually classes for adults and kids alike, so the whole family can make new friends.
Slide Into Their DMs
You can laugh at this (the Lars team certainly did), but when I was living in Denmark and didn’t know anyone I made friends by emailing all the designers I admired in magazines. Slick, I know.
Not everyone responded, but I did end up making one good friend! And I also first met my good friend Michele Brummer Everett (check out her work on the blog and in the shop) online before we became neighbors!
Now, don’t be creepy and definitely (please) respect people’s privacy, but it can work! We can all thank the internet for this very twenty-first century way to make friends as an adult. If it’s good enough for Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks in You’ve Got Mail, it’s good enough for you.
Grow a Garden and Work In It
I know it sounds quaint, but this truly works. Growing a garden can help you meet so many people! Apart from the obvious benefits of providing with fresh veggies, fruits, and flowers, gardens are great conversation starters. I bet you’re not the only one in your neighborhood looking to develop a green thumb, and you can swap seeds, plants, and tips with your newfound friends.
Get a Job at a Local Small Business
There’s this romantic idea that you can meet someone (whether romantically or platonically) by becoming a regular at a coffee shop or always reading in a certain section of the park. And you know what? Why not? It’s certainly not the most reliable or foolproof way to make friends as an adult, but maybe someone will notice you and want to become pals.
If this is your preferred method of making friends, you’ll increase your chances (and even make a few bucks) by getting a job at a local small business. If the business has frequent customers, then they’ll become familiar faces to you and you can strike up a friendship.
Go to the Dog Park
People at the dog park love talking about their dogs. That’s why they’re there! Just saunter on up and ask them what breed their dog is, and they’ll probably have a lot to say already.
Know that this one becomes a little awkward if you don’t have a dog of your own to bring, but if you’re trying to make friends as an adult you might just need to get creative.
Join a Workout Class
I made one of my best friends in a high school PE class, and we always joked that being sweaty and miserable brought us together. The good news is that you can still be sweaty and miserable and make friends! The bad other good news is that you don’t have to be in PE or high school anymore!
There are lots of free and affordable workout classes out there, and some of them even sound pretty fun! So grab your swim suit or yoga mat or whatever applicable gear you need and get out there.
Throw a Game Night
This one requires you to know somebody, but if you throw a game night and ask your guests to bring another friend you could meet a whole bunch more people! The other good part about this tactic is that you probably (hopefully) like your friends’ taste in people, so you’re likely to get along with the people they bring. We sell some fun printable games in our shop, so your whole evening is planned out!
Bring Your Neighbors a Treat
This one’s a classic, but it’s a classic for a really good reason! Food opens doors, and it definitely opens hearts. Make a charcuterie board or a quick batch of brownies (we won’t tell if you use a mix) and bring them to your neighbor’s house. Maybe you live right by your new best friend! Doesn’t that sound like a dream come true? You’ll never know unless you meet them.
More Ways to Make Friends
I want to hear about the ways that you make friends, too! Let me know how you’ve met your friends in the comments.
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